Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Randomize
