i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize