wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
I currently don't understand fingers.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
