i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
