i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
