I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
