He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Randomize
