so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize