She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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