like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
