we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I could make wine with my vomit
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
