Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Randomize
