can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
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