Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
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