remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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