i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Randomize
