I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
