just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
