I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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