all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
