butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
this hospital has no fireball
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
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