Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize