Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
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