One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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