I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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