She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Randomize
