What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Randomize