So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
