if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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