i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Will exercising make me less horny?
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