do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
