i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
