just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
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