she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize