I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
