Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Randomize
