This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
