Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
Randomize
