is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
