Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize
