I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
