your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
