Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I just gargled with NyQuil
Randomize
