She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
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