Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
