FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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