I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
