She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
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