I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
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