dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
Ketchup is God's man juice
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Holy shit dude........stairs
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