i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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